The Honking Goose

something to honk about

the best part about marriage is the sex, for 18+, NSFW


Yes, you read that correctly. You heard it here first, folks. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

sillouette of intimate couple about to kiss

Here’s the thing, sex with the partner you are married to is reoccurring. I think that’s a good thing. Practice makes perfect. And sex takes practice. No one is awesome at it the very first time. Some people are better than others, like any talent, but everyone can improve with practice. And practicing with the same partner means you are both improving together. That’s beautiful.

Now naturally, there are exceptions to any rule. So if you are married and the sex is just getting worse, I’m sorry, but you best believe it doesn’t have to be that way.

shows legs of two people spooning in bed

There is a prevailing belief in our culture that married people have sex infrequently. That may be true in many cases, but it is an oversimplification. Do they have sex less frequently than single people? Do they have less sex than they want to have sex? Think about it.

Most people will agree that sex is awkward. You are naked. You are trying to fit together like a puzzle, but the pieces came from different boxes. Plus, there is a tremendous variety of sexual desires and preferences. So finding a partner whose desires and preferences are similar enough to your own, as well as someone as eager to provide for you what you desire as you are eager to provide for them what they desire, well that is a tall order. So when you do find that person – super! – if marriage is your thing, put a ring on it! That is special, you are going to want to keep that around.

hands making a heart shape with light rays

Statistically, women have a harder time achieving orgasm than men. Orgasms are fan-fucking-tastic though, so everybody should have them. My experience has been that over the years, my orgasms have gone from really-very-good to better to mind-blowingly-awesome. If they can get even better than I currently experience, bring it on. I don’t know how, but I’m willing to experience it if it’s possible.

I attribute the improvement to being with a partner with whom I feel safe and loved and not judged. The walls come down, we loosen up, we relax, and we enjoy ourselves. We enjoy each other.

Caveat: I’m no expert. I have no formal education when it comes to marriage or sex, just my own experience and observations of others, from which I have formed these opinions. They are just that, opinions. Plus, when I say “the best part about marriage is the sex” I mean that pretty loosely, there are lots of best parts about marriage. I’m a big fan.

What do you think? Are there other factors I didn’t write about? Is married sex really as awesome as I say it is?

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15 comments on “the best part about marriage is the sex, for 18+, NSFW

  1. michelle213norton
    December 3, 2016

    I think if sex is relatively infrequent (cause that’s a matter of opinion,) it can heighten desire and make every encounter even better!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. annj49
    December 1, 2016

    Thought you might be interested in this:

    Esther Perel , the secret to desire in a long term relationship

    I really enjoy listening to this lady talk about her studies in the area of relationships and sexuality.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. curiouslife2016
    November 28, 2016

    I agree that sex is definintely millions of times better when it is with a long term partner. When I found my man, I couldn’t believe the orgasms I had, they’re completely mind blowing.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Haynestown.com
    November 28, 2016

    A close second best from when I was married…some days, when I didn’t feel like it, someone else folded and put away the laundry 😊.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. joey
    November 28, 2016

    I agree. The quality of sex with a long-term partner is superior and seems only to get better and better. Years of exploration encourage more years of exploration and the kinds and moods and offerings change, like a sex menu. I’m certain I have less sex now than I did as a single person — sometimes long droughts, but then — sometimes hot summer flings, too. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    • thehonkinggoose
      November 29, 2016

      Oooo, those hot summer flings though… I also appreciate the intensity and satisfaction of a really good lay after a drought.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. annj49
    November 28, 2016

    I agree wholeheartedly. It just keeps getting better and better with the one partner. I sure enjoyed my late husband 😉

    This is my favourite part :

    “Most people will agree that sex is awkward. You are naked. You are trying to fit together like a puzzle, but the pieces came from different boxes.”

    Liked by 1 person

  7. nkdwhtguy
    November 28, 2016

    Yes sex is terrific in marriage, until it isn’t.

    Liked by 1 person

    • thehonkinggoose
      November 28, 2016

      Until it isn’t terrific/until it isn’t in the marriage. I know, marriage is certainly no guarantee of great sex.

      Like

  8. kittiephoenixromans08
    November 28, 2016

    Contrary to what most Christians believe, God created sex AND He called everything He created good. That said, married sex is really the only permitted sex within His boundaries (and for many reasons I’m going to stop before opening a six-pack of worm cans). And it IS good! 😉

    But I think there is an element you missed. This entire piece is focused on the physical. There is the emotional connection issue.

    At several points in the Bible, the act isn’t about procreation (although be fruitful and multiply is there); beyond unity, it’s about comfort (Rebekah going to Isaac on his mother’s death), passion (Song of Solomon/Song of Songs), and companionship (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, loosely translated and applied).

    Liked by 2 people

    • thehonkinggoose
      November 28, 2016

      Very fair. I did briefly touch on the emotional at the end “I attribute the improvement to being with a partner with whom I feel safe and loved and not judged.” But you are right, I could have, and should have, given that greater emphasis. Because that was really my whole point – lol – that the emotional intimacy of a marriage is what allows two partners to grow ever closer in the physical relationship.

      Thanks for the great feedback.

      Liked by 1 person

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This entry was posted on November 28, 2016 by in Love, Marriage, Personal and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , .
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